Jurassic Park Staff Chat 🦖

Good morning, team! What a glorious day. Our first guests arrive this afternoon. Everything is perfect. We spared no expense!

You spared no expense except, apparently, on the number of staff overseeing an island full of apex predators. You have fewer employees than a Wendy\'s.

Ian, please. Everything is automated. The systems are state of the art.

Morning check: all perimeter fences active. Raptor pen at full power. T-Rex paddock nominal. Dennis, can you confirm the security systems are green?

Yep all good

That was suspiciously fast. Did you actually check?

I said it\'s good Ray. Relax. Btw I might step out for a bit later. Personal errand.

Reminder: the velociraptors are testing the fences systematically. They\'re probing for weaknesses. They remember. I have said this 47 times. I am saying it again.

Robert, you worry too much. They\'re animals! Magnificent animals!

Quick question: when you say you\'ve engineered these dinosaurs to be all female, you\'re absolutely certain about that? Because I just saw something in the Triceratops paddock that suggests otherwise.

Life, uh, finds a way.

Ian, this is serious. Are the dinosaurs breeding?

I\'m saying that the history of evolution is that life escapes all barriers. Life breaks free. Life finds a way. Also, yes, obviously they\'re breeding.

Let\'s not jump to conclusions. The guests arrive at noon!

Where did Nedry go? Half the security systems just went offline.

The fences. The fences are off.

ALL the fences are off.

THE RAPTOR FENCES?

ALL OF THEM, ROBERT.

I hate being right.

Now everyone, let\'s not panic. I\'m sure there\'s a reasonable explanation. Dennis probably just stepped away for lunch.

The T-Rex is out of her paddock. She is currently standing next to the tour vehicles. Where your grandchildren are, John.

Oh dear.

For the record I am currently hiding in a tree with two children and a very large dinosaur is looking directly at us. I want my concerns about this park formally noted.

Clever girl.