Read the screenplay: FANNIEGATE — $7 trillion. 17 years. The biggest fraud in American capital markets.

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The Footlong Fraud

11 Inches of Lies and the Lawsuits That Changed Nothing

In 2013, an Australian teenager measured a Subway Footlong. It was 11 inches. The class action settlement: lawyers got $520,000, customers got absolutely nothing. An appeals court called the settlement “worthless.” Subway kept selling Footlongs. America kept buying them.

I was a hedge fund analyst. I literally got paid to verify whether companies were telling the truth. And somehow it took an Australian teenager with a ruler to figure out that Subway's Footlongs weren't a foot long. The due diligence gap between Wall Street and a kid in Perth is one inch, and the kid is winning.— Glen Bradford, has never once measured fast food but now feels compelled to

11"

Actual Length

of many 'Footlongs'

$520K

Lawyer Payout

for 'measuring bread'

$0

Customer Payout

not even a coupon

88%

Taco Bell's Beef

they won that fight

“Footlong Is Not a Measurement”

Subway's official defense was that “SUBWAY FOOTLONG” is a registered trademark and not intended as a measurement of length. Take a moment to appreciate the layers here: a company named a product “Footlong,” which contains the word “foot” — a unit of measurement equal to 12 inches — and then argued in federal court that the name doesn't imply a measurement.

This is the corporate equivalent of naming your child “Six Feet Tall Johnson” and then insisting the name has nothing to do with height. The legal system, to its credit, found this argument about as compelling as you'd expect.

The appeals court ultimately ruled that the length of the bread doesn't matter because the amount of meat, cheese, and vegetables is the same. You're losing bread, not filling. Which means the entire lawsuit was about an inch of bread. Lawyers made $520,000 arguing about bread.

The Full Timeline

From a teenager with a ruler to a $520K lawyer payday to every fast food chain getting sued.

January 2013The Discovery

An Australian Teenager Holds a Ruler Up to a Subway Sandwich

Matt Corby, a teenager in Perth, Australia, buys a Subway Footlong and does something nobody had apparently thought to do before: he measures it. It's 11 inches. He posts a photo on Facebook with the caption 'subway pls explain.' The post goes viral. Millions of people around the world realize they've never measured their Footlong either. They start measuring. Many of them are also not 12 inches. The internet does what it does best: collectively loses its mind over something that is simultaneously trivial and deeply offensive.

January 2013Comedy Gold

Subway's Response: 'Footlong Is Not a Measurement. It's a Trademark.'

Subway releases a statement explaining that 'SUBWAY FOOTLONG' is a registered trademark and 'is not intended to be a measurement of length.' This is — and I say this with genuine admiration for the audacity — one of the most remarkable corporate statements in fast food history. The word 'footlong' contains the word 'foot.' A foot is a unit of measurement. It equals 12 inches. Subway is arguing that when they say 'footlong,' they don't mean 'a foot long.' The internet does not accept this explanation.

February 2013The Lawsuit

Class Action Lawsuits Filed Across the United States

Within weeks, multiple class action lawsuits are filed against Subway in U.S. courts. The central allegation: Subway's Footlong sandwiches are consistently shorter than 12 inches, and this constitutes false advertising. Subway argues that bread is a natural product and exact dimensions will vary. The plaintiffs argue that 'Footlong' means 'a foot long.' The legal system is now being asked to determine the precise semantic meaning of the word 'footlong' as applied to bread. We are, as a society, exactly where we deserve to be.

2015The Resolution

The Settlement: Subway Agrees to... Measure Their Bread

The class action lawsuit reaches a settlement. The terms: Subway agrees to implement procedures to ensure their Footlong subs are actually 12 inches long. That's it. That's the settlement. Subway will now measure bread. The class attorneys receive $520,000 in fees. The class members — the actual customers who bought short sandwiches — receive nothing. Not a coupon. Not a refund. Not even a free six-inch (which is presumably five and a half inches). The lawyers measured the settlement, and it was exactly the right size for them.

2016The Resolution

Appeals Court Throws Out the Settlement — Calls It Worthless

The U.S. Court of Appeals for the Seventh Circuit overturns the settlement, and the opinion is one of the more entertaining pieces of legal writing in recent memory. Judge Diane Sykes writes that the settlement 'provides no meaningful benefits to class members' and is basically just a payday for lawyers. The court notes that a sandwich being slightly shorter than 12 inches causes no measurable harm to consumers because the amount of ingredients is the same regardless of bread length. In other words: a slightly shorter sandwich has the same amount of meat, cheese, and vegetables. You're losing bread, not filling. The court effectively says the whole lawsuit was pointless.

2022The Copycats

Burger King Gets Sued — Whoppers 35% Smaller Than Advertised

A class action lawsuit accuses Burger King of using misleading photos that make the Whopper look approximately 35% larger than the actual burger. The lawsuit includes side-by-side comparisons of the advertised Whopper and the real one, and — look, this won't surprise anyone who has ever ordered fast food — they don't look the same. The ad version is photographed from below with a wide-angle lens, the patty is positioned to overflow the bun, and the vegetables are artfully arranged. The real version looks like it was assembled during an earthquake. The case is ongoing.

2022The Copycats

Wendy's Sued for Misleading Burger Photos

Wendy's faces a similar lawsuit alleging their menu photos exaggerate burger sizes by 15-20%. The plaintiff argues that Wendy's uses advertising tricks — undercooked patties that look bigger, carefully placed ingredients, and camera angles that maximize apparent size — to make their burgers look substantially larger than what customers receive. Wendy's, the chain famous for tweeting 'Our beef is way too cool to ever be frozen,' now has to explain why their burgers look different from their photos. This is, of course, true of literally every fast food chain, which is kind of the point.

2011 (Throwback)Comedy Gold

Taco Bell's '88% Beef' Controversy — And They Actually Won

An Alabama law firm files suit claiming Taco Bell's 'seasoned beef' is only 36% beef, with the rest being fillers like oats, soy, and water. Taco Bell responds with an unprecedented counteroffensive: full-page newspaper ads with the headline 'Thank you for suing us.' They release their recipe, showing the meat is 88% beef with 12% seasonings and other ingredients — standard for seasoned taco meat. The law firm drops the suit. Taco Bell wins the PR battle definitively. It remains the only fast food measurement scandal where the chain came out looking good. Their beef: 88%. Their confidence: 100%.

OngoingComedy Gold

McDonald's Quarter Pounder — It's a Quarter Pound Before Cooking

The McDonald's Quarter Pounder weighs a quarter pound (4 ounces) before cooking. After cooking, it weighs approximately 2.8-3.2 ounces due to moisture loss. This is industry standard — all burgers lose weight when cooked — and it's disclosed in fine print. Nobody has successfully sued over this, but it exists in the same philosophical space as the Subway Footlong: when a fast food chain names a product after a measurement, are they promising that measurement? McDonald's says the name refers to the pre-cooked weight. Customers assume it refers to what they're eating. Neither party has ever measured their food before this became a conversation.

2023–2024The Resolution

The Pattern: Every Major Chain Gets Sued, Nothing Changes

By the mid-2020s, virtually every major fast food chain has faced litigation over portion sizes or misleading advertising. The pattern is always the same: consumer notices discrepancy, lawyer files class action, chain settles or wins, nothing meaningfully changes. The fundamental issue is that fast food advertising has always been aspirational. Nobody expects the burger to look like the photo. The legal question is whether 'nobody expects it' is a defense or an admission. The philosophical question is why we keep ordering.

The Measurement Hall of Fame

Every fast food chain that's been caught with a tape measure.

Subway: Footlong Sub

😂😂😂😂😂

The Claim

12 inches

The Reality

11 inches (often)

The Outcome

Lawyers got $520K. Customers got nothing. Settlement overturned.

Burger King: Whopper

😂😂😂😂😂

The Claim

As shown in ads

The Reality

~35% smaller than photos

The Outcome

Ongoing litigation

Wendy's: Hamburgers

😂😂😂😂😂

The Claim

As shown in menu photos

The Reality

15-20% smaller than advertised

The Outcome

Ongoing litigation

Taco Bell: Seasoned Beef

😂😂😂😂😂

The Claim

Beef

The Reality

88% beef, 12% seasoning

The Outcome

Taco Bell won. Ran victory ads. Legend behavior.

McDonald's: Quarter Pounder

😂😂😂😂😂

The Claim

Quarter pound

The Reality

Quarter pound pre-cooking, ~3 oz after

The Outcome

Technically correct (the best kind of correct)

The Cast of Characters

A teenager with a ruler, a corporation that said “footlong isn't a measurement,” and lawyers who made half a million dollars arguing about bread.

Matt Corby

Australian Teenager / The Man With a Ruler and a Dream

A teenager in Perth, Australia, who bought a Subway Footlong, measured it, found it was 11 inches, posted a photo to Facebook, and accidentally launched a global class action lawsuit. He did not receive money from the settlement. He did receive the satisfaction of being the person who made millions of adults measure their sandwiches.

subway pls explain

Subway Corporate

The Chain That Said 'Footlong Doesn't Mean a Foot Long'

Faced with photographic evidence that their Footlong subs were 11 inches, Subway's legal team argued that 'SUBWAY FOOTLONG' is a registered trademark, not a measurement. This is technically a legal argument. It is also the kind of statement that makes you question whether corporate lawyers live in the same reality as the rest of us. The word 'foot' is in the name. It's right there.

SUBWAY FOOTLONG is a registered trademark as a descriptive name for the sub and not intended to be a measurement of length.

The Class Action Lawyers

The Only Winners / $520,000 for Measuring Bread

Filed class action lawsuits on behalf of millions of Subway customers who received sub-12-inch Footlongs. Negotiated a settlement where Subway agreed to measure their bread. Received $520,000 in legal fees for their efforts. Their clients — the actual customers — received nothing. Not a coupon. Not a free sandwich. Nothing. The lawyers' compensation was measured, and it was exactly 12 inches.

This settlement provides meaningful relief to class members.

Judge Diane Sykes

Appeals Court Judge / Called the Settlement 'Worthless'

Wrote the Seventh Circuit opinion overturning the Subway settlement, noting that it provided 'no meaningful benefits to class members' and that the amount of ingredients in the sandwich was the same regardless of bread length. Her opinion is one of the more entertaining pieces of judicial writing in recent food law, a field that shouldn't exist but absolutely does.

A class action that seeks only worthless benefits for the class should not be certified.

Taco Bell Legal Team

The One Fast Food Chain That Fought Back and Won

When sued over their beef content, Taco Bell didn't settle, didn't apologize, and didn't quietly make changes. They ran full-page newspaper ads thanking the plaintiffs for suing them, released their recipe, and dared anyone to find a problem. The lawsuit was dropped. It remains the only fast food measurement scandal where the chain emerged with more credibility than before. Absolute power move.

Thank you for suing us. Here's the truth about our seasoned beef.

Every Person Who Has Ever Ordered Fast Food

The Real Victims / We All Know It Won't Look Like the Photo

Billions of people worldwide have ordered fast food knowing, on some level, that the burger will not look like the picture. This is the unspoken social contract of fast food: we pretend the photo is real, they pretend the food matches. When someone breaks this contract by measuring or photographing the discrepancy, we all act surprised. We are not surprised. We just don't usually bring a ruler.

I mean, I knew it wouldn't look like the picture, but still.

The Sandwich Math

Length of a 'Footlong'

as measured by an Australian teenager

11"

Missing sandwich

roughly 8.3% of the sandwich

1 inch

Class attorney fees

for measuring bread

$520,000

Customer compensation

not even a free cookie

$0.00

Average Subway Footlong price (2013)

8.3% of that = 56 cents of bread

$6.75

Cost to Subway of the PR disaster

still selling footlongs

Priceless

Taco Bell's beef content

they won and ran victory ads

88%

The Fast Food Honesty Meter

Taco Bell's Beef Claim88%

Said 'seasoned beef.' Was 88% beef, 12% seasoning. Ran victory ads. Released the recipe. Absolute legend behavior.

McDonald's Quarter Pounder70%

Quarter pound before cooking. Less after. Technically correct. The best kind of correct.

Subway Footlong92%

Named 'Footlong.' Was 11 inches. Argued 'Footlong' isn't a measurement. Points for creativity, if not honesty.

Burger King Whopper (ads vs. reality)65%

Ads make it look 35% bigger. Uses camera angles, undercooked patties, and food styling. Standard industry practice.

Your Expectations vs. Reality (all fast food)20%

The social contract: they pretend the photo is real, we pretend to believe it. Nobody brings a ruler. Usually.

Why This Story Matters (Kind Of)

Look, nobody died from a short sandwich. This isn't Equifax or Theranos. But the Subway Footlong scandal is a perfect little parable about how consumer protection actually works in America: a company makes a measurably false claim, lawyers file a class action, the lawyers get paid, consumers get nothing, an appeals court calls the whole thing pointless, and the company keeps doing what it was doing.

The appeals court was right — the filling is the same in an 11-inch and a 12-inch sandwich. You're losing bread, not value. But the broader point stands: if a company calls something a “Footlong” and it's not a foot long, what exactly does truth in advertising mean?

The answer, apparently, is that truth in advertising means whatever the lawyers can negotiate for $520,000.

Glen's Take

I have to be honest: the Taco Bell response is one of my favorite moments in corporate communications history. Most companies get sued and hire a crisis PR firm. Taco Bell took out full-page newspaper ads saying “Thank you for suing us” and released their entire recipe. That's not crisis management. That's a power move. 88% beef, 100% confidence.

As for Subway: I spent my career analyzing public companies and identifying discrepancies between what management said and what the numbers showed. An 8.3% shortfall is material. If a public company's revenue was 8.3% lower than what they reported, that's a restatement. If their sandwich is 8.3% shorter than its name implies, that's a trademark.

Genuinely though, the appeals court ruling was correct. The meat, cheese, and vegetables are the same. You're arguing about bread. Lawyers made half a million dollars arguing about bread. I chose the wrong career.

11 inches of corporate honesty. Share this.

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Frequently Asked Questions

Was the Subway Footlong actually 11 inches?

Many of them were, yes. After Matt Corby's viral Facebook post in 2013, people around the world measured their Subway Footlongs and found that many were between 11 and 11.5 inches. Subway's explanation — that bread is a natural product and dimensions vary — is technically true, but the consistency of the shortfall suggested it was a systemic issue with recipe portioning rather than random variation.

Did customers get any money from the Subway lawsuit?

No. The settlement required Subway to implement measurement procedures for their bread. Class members received nothing — no refunds, no coupons, no free sandwiches. The class attorneys received $520,000 in fees. The settlement was later overturned by an appeals court that called it 'worthless' for consumers.

Is fast food advertising legally required to be accurate?

Sort of. The FTC prohibits 'unfair or deceptive' advertising, and food advertising must be 'truthful, not misleading, and, when appropriate, backed by scientific evidence.' However, there's a widely recognized exception for 'puffery' — exaggerated claims that no reasonable consumer would take literally. The legal question in these cases is whether showing a bigger-than-actual burger constitutes deceptive advertising or acceptable puffery. Courts have gone both ways.

Did Taco Bell actually win their lawsuit?

Yes, decisively. When sued over claims their 'seasoned beef' was only 36% beef, Taco Bell released their recipe showing it was 88% beef with 12% seasonings (water, spices, oats, etc.) — standard for seasoned taco meat. They ran full-page newspaper ads with the headline 'Thank you for suing us.' The plaintiff's law firm dropped the suit. Taco Bell emerged from the scandal with arguably more credibility than before.

Is a Quarter Pounder actually a quarter pound?

The patty weighs a quarter pound (4 ounces) before cooking. After cooking, moisture loss reduces it to approximately 2.8-3.2 ounces. This is standard for all cooked meat and is disclosed by McDonald's. The name refers to the pre-cooked weight, which is industry practice. Whether you feel this is honest depends on whether you think 'Quarter Pounder' describes the raw ingredient or the finished product you eat.

Why is this on Glen Bradford's website?

Because the Subway Footlong scandal is a perfect microcosm of consumer capitalism: a product named after a specific measurement doesn't meet that measurement, the lawsuit benefits only the lawyers, the appeals court calls the whole thing pointless, and we all keep ordering footlongs. I'm a finance guy who used to analyze public companies. The Subway Footlong is the shortest — literally — example of the gap between what companies promise and what they deliver.

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